When the captains of each respective squad met at half court, I, your Capitan, stood face to abdominals with what National Geographic might accurate label as a true behemoth. To say this guy was massive is an understatement. He was tall (at least 6’7), he was wide, his knuckles touched the ground, and he would prove to be the great equalizer in a game in which every point we scored went down like trying to swallow a three day old steak cooked off a street cart.The game started surprisingly stalemated. Neither team got their buckets to fall for about the 1st five minutes. Our outside shots were off, our inside game suffocated by their two big men, and the only way it seemed to stop them, was to take our their #2 big man at the knees. And off the court he limped until he realized that Italian Soccer Dives don’t garner sympathy in basketball. My question is, why wasn’t a time out called against their team when he went down, but when I got smacked in the face and had a contact fall out, one was called against us? Either way, as I sat on the sidelines trying to regain vision by cleaning out a dirty contact in my mouth and sticking it back in my eye (my highlight of the game), the Burgundy’s got their zone offense going, taking advantage of their Herman Munster center while we were missing our big man, Robert “6’4” Loef. We got to get the INS off his back, so he can make all games going forward. In his absence Russ “6’0” Ringelstein and Don “6’2” Janocha worked hard to come between their big men and the basket. But even our biggest men looked a full head short compared to their giants. It was a rough slow first half with the score 22-12.
The second half proved to be even slower as we could not get our outside shots to fall, and again their big men clogged the lanes as we relentlessly did not get calls in our favor as we attacked the rim. We collapsed on their big men well in the 2nd half, but doing so left their guards wide open, with all day to set and shoot, and unfortunately for us, they hit some big threes. Even Spanky, their fat little pudgy guard who could only run up and the down the court two times a rotation, hit 2 wide open threes. With eight minutes left in the game, Ron Burgundy the cowards that they are, played four corner basketball to run the clock out.
Final Score: Good Guys 24, Bad Guys 42
Highlights
- I was blinded, but I heard that Josh “last comic standing” Homer took it
coast to coast for a pretty put back
- “Mad” Max Linsky dumping in a high floater off glass to avoid the
giant wing span of their monster center.
- Russ “Jersey Born and Raised” Ringelstein with two clutch free throws
after a technical foul was given for not having matching jerseys.
- Eddie “El Diablo” Larios with a colliding steal in the 2nd half for a lay in.
With a 1-1 record, and no more bye weeks this season, we have 6 straight weeks of basketball left. Plenty of time to forget about this loss and keep moving forward. I wouldn’t be surprised if that team goes undefeated, and when we meet them in the playoffs, it will be a different story. The full schedule is posted at www.nyurban.com. Check it out. We have some familiar foes. Technically Foul and The Gromits, both whom we should beat. Our goal now is to come in at 7-1. Regardless of the score, we played tight defense, and worked the ball well for our open shots. We just got to keep shooting and the shots will eventually fall. Or not. Keep shooting.
Next game: Wed, 07/15 at Trinity Gym, 8:50 VS RAGE
- El Capitán
